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The many Faces of Grief

Spring is unfurling, the season of renewal, of emergence, of starting afresh, of nature bursting into bloom and blossoms.

If you’re grieving your loved one or pet, spring can feel jarring. How can everything just carry on without your loved one or furry friend like nothing has happened?

You might feel like you want to hide away under your duvet and the pain and sadness of your loss can feel overwhelming.

The absence of and separation from your loved one or beloved pet can be hard to deal with and adjust to, so please be kind and compassionate with yourself.

Whilst nature follows the seasons and the tides follow the moon, grief and sorrow follow their own path.

What this path looks and feels like is very individual. You might be isolating and withdrawing yourself from the people around you.

You might have had a complicated or difficult relationship with the person or pet you have lost and there might be a sense of unfinished business that can be tricky to navigate.

You might not want to talk about your loss because it feels too painful. You might feel the opposite and be desperate to talk about your loved one or pet, to share memories because that is all you have left.

You might want to keep some things to remember your loved one or pet by. You might want to make a memory box or have a memorial for them in your home which might bring you some comfort.

You might feel the opposite and want to give away any reminders because they are just too painful, they might make the absence feel too real.

You might come to terms quickly with your loss and find a way to move forwards without your loved one or pet. Or you might struggle and it might take you a long time to get your head around what has happened, to heal, to find joy and happiness again.

There is no time limit on grief and there is no right or wrong way to grieve. Grief follows its own path. Do whatever feels right for you and know that that’s okay.

I recently wrote about losing my beloved cat Charlie. Last week was her birthday and I couldn’t bear to stay in the house. So we went out for the day and I felt some guilt around that but whilst it didn’t necessarily make the day any less painful, not being in the house and being out in nature, did help me to cope a bit better.

When you are grieving, you are facing a lot of firsts. The first birthday, Christmas, anniversary, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day without them and that is heartbreaking.

You might wish to think about what might help you during those days and in the lead up and what support you might need.

Please know that you are not alone and that there is no shame in asking for help. The pain and sadness you feel is valid and it is real.

Grief is a difficult journey. Take care of yourself.

path with trees either side

Helpline Numbers

The Samaritans- 116 123,

 The Hub of Hope-

 Shout (Crisis Text Service)- 85258

Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM)- 0800 58 58 58, 17.00pm-midnight every day

Cruse Bereavement Support

Helpline: 0808 808 1677

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